lead of love

since feeling is first

2009-06-18T18:41:00.000-07:00

hey friends,

nothing exciting today. i'm currently enjoying a glass of wine (don't worry, no driving for the night!), it's a syrah/grenache blend called cote de crows from morgan winery in 06, very delicious. i'm also finally going to start making art again, part of my list inspired by http://www.dayzeroproject.com/. you make a list of 101 things you want to do in 1001 days (about 2.75 years). it's a very interesting process to make one, i'll share a few of my favorites from my list:

1. run a half marathon

19. learn sign language

34. read 15 books from the new york times' best seller list

50. learn all the words to "it's the end of the world" by R.E.M.

98. finish the curriculum in my calculus textbook

ongoing process that's not on the list: discern if God is calling me to become Catholic. believe me, this is the last thing i ever thought i'd even consider. it's been a very trying (my family has made it clear they are NOT happy about this), very enlightening and very lonely journey, but i'm incredibly thankful for it. mostly i've been reading books and doing research (you never really leave school do you?) but mostly prayers right now would be most helpful.

that's all. enjoy life:)

and i was born inside the sun this morning..

2009-06-08T21:42:00.000-07:00

fact: mondays in the summer are just better:)

got back from spending the weekend in pennsylvania yesterday evening. went caving at laurel caverns (pleasantly surprised that it was more difficult than i thought!) and white water rafting at ohiopyle on the yaughiogheny river. thank goodness for finally being outdoors again! got a bit of a sunburn but it probably wouldn't be a good trip if i didn't. for now i am off to bed and playing with the preschoolers in the morning!

i did find a beautiful prayer that i really like though. it's called the Anima Christi and it's from around the 14th century:

Soul of Christ, sanctify me

Body of Christ, save me

Blood of Christ, inebriate me

Water from Christ's side, wash me

Passion of Christ, strengthen me

O good Jesus, hear me

Within Thy wounds hide me

Suffer me not to be separated from Thee

From the malicious enemy defend me

In the hour of my death call me

And bid me to come unto Thee

That I may praise Thee with Thy Saints

and with Thy angels

Forever and ever

Amen

SO beautiful! going to have to commit this one to memory:)

"everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves." -jung

2009-06-02T10:47:00.001-07:00

so i usually HATE social science kinds of things (being a natural science person myself), and especially personality psychology kinds of things.. but for some reason lately i've been really into the myers-briggs test, pretty much because it describes me perfectly. according to this test, i'm an INFP (introverted intuitive feeling perceiving)

some cool excerpts (emphasis mine):

-INFPs do not like conflict, and go to great lengths to avoid it. If they must face it, they will always approach it from the perspective of their feelings. In conflict situations, INFPs place little importance on who is right and who is wrong. They focus on the way that the conflict makes them feel, and indeed don't really care whether or not they're right

-INFPs have very high standards and are perfectionists. Consequently, they are usually hard on themselves, and don't give themselves enough credit. INFPs may have problems working on a project in a group, because their standards are likely to be higher than other members' of the group

-INFPs are usually talented writers. They may be awkard and uncomfortable with expressing themselves verbally, but have a wonderful ability to define and express what they're feeling on paper-INFPs present a calm, pleasant face to the world. They appear to be tranquil and peaceful to others, with simple desires. In fact, the INFP internally feels his or her life intensely. In the relationship arena, this causes them to have a very deep capacity for love and caring which is not frequently found with such intensity in the other types

-strengths: deep capacity for love and caring, driven to meet others' needs, flexible and diverse

-weaknesses: extreme dislike of criticism, strong need to receive praise and affirmation, tendency to blame themselves for problems and hold everything on their own shoulders

there's a book that was recommended to me called "who we are is how we pray", which is supposed to discuss various kinds of (christian) spirituality based on these personality types. as soon as i get my hands on a copy i'll update:)

when i drive myself, my light is found

2009-05-24T20:08:00.001-07:00

i did it. i gave in and started a blog. maybe it's the reflective, recent graduate instinct in me.

quick starting answers:

-the blog title is the name of a song by a band called caedmon's call, which has the most beautiful lyrics ("though I questioned the sky, now I see why/ had to walk the rocks to see the mountain view/ looking back I see the lead of love")

-i am a Christian, and thoroughly in love with my God. in recent years i've sort of had a renewal of my faith and God has revealed many new things to me.. sometimes i feel like such a spiritual infant, but my faith is what gives me purpose, strength and hope

-i am moving 1400 miles away from the state that i was born and raised in for the first 22 years of my life in 3 months.. i am terrified and beyond excited

-i am leaving to go to grad school and get my phd in neuroscience..i love science and all of the new knowledge we have yet to uncover

-i love being outside, especially running and anything in the mountains

i'm currently in the middle of reading "the physics of christianity" (CHALLENGING, but incredibly interesting), "hail, holy queen" (about Saint Mary) and "the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy" (cannot even begin to explain the plot or purpose, but it's hysterical). i'll have to do some book reviewing in later posts. for now, more basketball and apartment searching:)